There are two types of Protector Parts. Today we will learn about Managers. Managers try to organize our world in a way so we never feel hurt again. Essentially, their motto is “Never again” and they try to achieve this by staying one step ahead of potential threats. Pretty tall order, right?
Managers are very proactive. They attempt to anticipate issues before they arise and work tirelessly to prevent them. Managers commonly show up as:
Perfectionists
Organizers
The Judge or Inner Critic
Caregivers
Problem scanners and solvers
The Intellectual
Common traits of Managers include the following:
Hard working
Dedicated
Dependable
Risk adverse
Believe they have the right answer for every situation
Managers are not “bad”. No Part is. They perform their jobs for very good reasons. At some point, their efforts and strategies likely helped you avoid shame, guilt, rejection, chaos, or overwhelm. It’s because of this that Managers stay on high alert for survival.
Unfortunately for our Managers, no matter how skilled they may be, the Exile Part will still be activated. Managers may even take on extreme versions of their originally intended roles. This can happen when they don’t trust the Self to take the lead when problems arise.
Understanding our Managers and getting curious about them helps us move toward increased self-compassion. In turn, when Managers feel supported and cared for, real healing becomes possible.
If you are curious to learn more about EMDR, IFS-informed EMDR, or are interested in beginning your EMDR/IFS-informed EMDR therapy journey, please reach out to me via the Contact Me page on my website. You can also learn more about EMDR as well as additional EMDR therapists in your area by visiting the EMDR International Association’s website here. You can learn more about IFS by visiting the IFS Institute’s website here.
Reminder: these blog posts are meant to be purely educational and/or entertainment tools and do NOT replace psychotherapy and/or other medically necessary treatments.